Just checking in...

You know, I really don't have anything interesting to write about tonight... It's pretty much status quo around here. I am tired because I am getting up at 7am in the morning now, and I have spent years and years on swing shift at my previous job. Sometimes I would work until 2am back then, so as a result I am not used to the morning thing now. If I ever become a teacher then I will have to get used to the morning thing, so I might as well just learn to like it.

My monitor is freaking out. I have a bad feeling it's going to die soon. Maybe I can con my mom or someone into buying me a new monitor for Christmas.

If it's not one thing it's another.

-'Mad

That time of the year...

September/October is my favorite time of the year. Don't need the heater, don't need the AC. Fall colors. Cool but not cold. Rain. What's not to like?

-'Mad

Just stuff...

I am a little worried about this job. I could work my butt off and still not make enough to get ahead. I need to find something better methinks, but on the other hand, I have only been here for 3 weeks. I hate to give up so soon.

The Christmas season is coming soon, I suspect that will help me make more money. Not only in increased commission, but in increased hours. We'll see. I will give it until January to redeem itself, and if it is determined that I am just not going to make enough money to get anywhere, I will start looking for another job.

In other news, I really really am feeling the need to game. I have a big DnD Jones right now, but nobody to play it with, except online. I like play by post, but it isn't the same as tabletop. I need to find a group here locally.

Hmm... I think my monitor is dying. The bottom of the screen keeps flickering. It has flickered about 12 or 13 times in the time I have written this post. That isn't good. Maybe I will make a new monitor a Christmas wish. That, and Windows Vista. I have heard tons of bad things about vista, but it is a 64 bit OS that handles my high end games, so what else can I do?

-'Mad

Remembering...

As of 9 minutes ago, it is September 11th. I wonder what the world's reaction will be today. I don't doubt that the American news media will at least mention it, but I wonder what the rest of the world will do since most other countries have moved on and seemingly mostly forgotten.

I believe we should remember and honor those that died that day, but at the same time I can't help but remember all the stuff that happened in the aftermath. Many things the government has done to "protect our security" (such as the Patriot act) I strongly disagree with. The wars and freedom-sacrificing laws that have been passed since then have tainted September 11th for me to the point that I now don't always remember and reflect about September 11th 2001 as I should, but instead get angry about what has transpired since.

I shall try to remember and reflect on the right things.

Lost

I have a dead end job. I want to be in school but can't afford it. I know this is old news to the people that know me, but I seem to be stuck in that rut. I am really unhappy, with the exception of my marriage. Steph does more for me than I could ever possibly express. I wish I could do more for her. I wish I could be better, be in school, be doing the things I want to do. I feel lost.

-'Mad

worky worky and music!

I have now been working "on the floor" for a few days (4 I think) and I have to say that there is the potential for me to really like the job. The problem is I can see the handwriting on the wall, and I know that this job isn't going to ever get me through school. It pays very poorly. I get about 37-39 hours per week, which is good, but at these ridiculously low wages, I will have a hard time making enough to live, much less save any money. I do earn “commission,” but they have it rigged so that you never make very much unless you are just an absolute FIEND at selling. The store that I work at is very slow, (the mall it’s in is very dead… hardly anyone there…) so that makes it very hard to ever make any money on commission.

I need some new bands to listen to, or for my current favorites to come out with some new stuff. I got into Viikate and Kotiteollisuus, both of which are bands from Finland, but my Finnish teachers are too busy right now to help me understand the songs. I have three people that I talk to over MSN messenger and Facebook that are from Finland, but they are all mostly unavailable. Oh, well, the music is good.

...oh, and Finnish to English online dictionaries suck. PERIOD. They rarely get it right.

As far as German music, I am still into Eisbrecher and Rammstein of course, but I need more. KMFDM and Megaherz are good, but I need more options. I'd love to hear suggestions. Maybe I need to get back into Nine Inch Nails. I loved his older stuff...

-'Mad